Random thought

Disturbed
I'm not.. Why do they keep staring at me suspiciously?

They can no longer distinguish my characteristics.
I can no longer pretend to be what I'm not.
"I wonder what has gotten into you, you are changed..." They say. I stare back, blankly, not even trying to protest or deny anything.
How did anyone come to a conclusion that I have changed? Why is everyone suddenly accusing me as if I committed a crime.
Do they even realize that it hurts me.
It hurts that they never bothered to get to know me in the first place.
I was hiding behind layers of respect.
Respect this, respect that. Don't say this don't say that. 
That person is older than you, while this person is younger than you; be considerate.
I kept being considerate to everyone, so they just assumed I'm weak. 
They did take me for granted but I thought I was being the better person. Apparently they do not view it the same way.

So, by changed do they mean I started speaking out my thoughts and no longer hide them? Or is it that I can not stand hypocrisy anymore, in fact.. I no longer tolerate it.
True, I played along for too long, but I'm exhausted now. I do not want to take a part in this play anymore.
I have enough voices in my head, I do not need to hear anyone else's voice anymore.
What is right? What is wrong? I do not care.
I'm not changed, I'm just showing the sides I was too scared to show before, because I was busy being considerate to everyone's feelings but mine.
Shouldn't I get encouraged for all that I've done, and maybe a little more  encouragement that I want to show the real side of me. 
So why is the resistance..
Why all the judgmental looks..
Weren't they the ones who kept saying 'freedom of speech' and encouraging it? Weren't they, too the ones who kept saying 'we don't judge only god judges?' 
I'm just speaking my thoughts, I'm telling you exactly what's on my mind, and not what you want to hear. Didn't you ask me about MY THOUGHTS regarding whatever you did ask?
Is it really wrong to shape my own thoughts?
While I'm lost with my own thoughts in here, trying not to think about right and wrong maybe you should too, ask yourself what happened, and why do you not accept the fact that I'm finally showing my true colors. That I'm finally putting me first.
We only live ones right? well, I've wasted too much time trying to be the perfect person you wanted me to be, but not anymore. I'm happy and accepting my imperfections. I love my flaws.
I'm not changing for you, or anyone.